Giving 'til it Doesn't Hurt

The best remedy for poverty is generosity.

Whenever I’m feeling closed, stingy or possessive, the easiest way for me to change that is to do the opposite of what I feel like doing: giving to someone else. 

From our usual perspective we tend to think that giving implies getting something back. When we expect something back after giving of ourselves, our time, our love, or material wealth, we aren’t practicing generosity, we’re engaging in a form of currency: If I do this for you, you had better do something just as nice for me one day.

 It’s possible to transform our idea of giving from something that feels like an act of extreme sacrifice to a process as natural as the rain. The sky never fears that it will run out of clouds if it rains too much: it realizes that there is a cycle going on that doesn’t require any worry or expectation. When the time is right, it rains. When the time is right, there’s enough moisture in the atmosphere gathering to form clouds once again. No big deal.

If you’re giving until it “hurts”, you’re doing it wrong.

 If you’re doing it right, what follows generosity is a sense of lightness and relief. Giving offers us a reprieve from our usual state of self-absorption and reminds us that our happiness is intimately interconnected with all other people, whether we know them or not, whether they look like us or not. 

Giving offers us the opportunity to realize that the lines we draw between ourselves and others are imaginary and never lead to happiness for anyone.

True generosity helps us understand that we don’t have to worry about undocumented immigrants “stealing” our jobs or our resources. An open heart precludes any notions of taking care of “our own” first because our definition of who falls under that category expands. 

The openness we develop when we cultivate a generous heart gives us a broader perspective which helps us see through such misguided ideas.

When you encounter an individual or a group of people that makes you cringe, notice the sense of physical and emotional contraction going on. It’s both an opportunity to learn something about yourself and to understand where in your life you can benefit from opening up.