Homophobia Under the Guise of Buddhism and Karma

I've received an unexpected amount of hate mail since my previous posting about a dubiously worded post at "The Daily Enlightenment" earlier this week. 


On a Facebook group I belong to, someone posted the following comment:


...I didn't see any "homophobia" in either one. You didn't seem to, either, because you wrote this: "I don't feel that the author harbors and blatant hatred or homophobia in his or her heart..."

Regardless, just because someone disagrees with your opinion does not mean he or she is "homophobic." That's an emotionally charged word that hinders communication and promotes alienation. There may be more skillful ways to bridge gaps between people....


My response:

Brother ________,

Thank you for helping me clarify for myself and others what I wish to communicate. These points can be very subtle, particularly for those of us who do not belong to a minority group and have not experienced any kind of bias from the majority.

Everyone has the right to their opinion, but many opinions can lead to beliefs, behaviors, and social policies that cause a great deal of suffering for others. Many racist people are of the opinion that black and hispanic people are somehow inferior. I have actually heard people who consider themselves Buddhists openly speculate about why some people are born female, inferring that being a woman in this lifetime is some sort of karmic payback for transgressions made in previous lifetimes. It’s as if being born male is considered normal and if someone is female, there needs to be some explanation. 

In the case of what I am addressing, some context needs to be applied here. It was only 40 years ago that homosexuality was de-classified as a mental illness by the American Psychiatric Association. Before that, there were many theories as to “why” someone is born gay or lesbian. All of those reasons have been proven incorrect time and time again, yet some still look for reasons to explain why LGBT people exist, but don’t pose the same question when any talk of heterosexuality arises. 

So it is indeed offensive that when a simple question such as “Is it ok to be gay?” is asked, the answer and the comments that follow include statements about past life explanations, precepts, sex and lust. A correct answer would have simply been something like: “The Buddha never spoke about homosexuality so there is no scriptural references condoning homosexuality as might be found in the Christian bible.” 

But instead, the author belied his/her prejudices in the second to last paragraph of the original post by inexplicably talking about "changing preferences over the course of many lifetimes", and saying people are “born gay/lesbian due to past life influences.” This implies that there needs to be some explanation for the very existence of an LGBT person, yet this has nothing to do with the initial question. When one tries to come up with causes they are pathologizing an entire group of people. And there are some who are still practicing reparative therapies (under the guise of psychology and/or religion) which have been repeatedly debunked both ethically and scientifically.

For some odd reason, the author also starts talking about the Third Precept and sexual misconduct which also has nothing to do with the initial question and belies a bias based on incorrect beliefs and yes, homophobia on the part of the poster. For some reason, when gay and lesbian people are apoken of, some people automatically swing their thoughts and attention to sex, lust, and misconduct. This is all very subtle and very easy to miss if one has never been the target of such biased treatment.

And if the author felt there was nothing wrong with the initial wording of that posting, s/he would not have secretly altered it to less offensive wording and then allowed the cyber sniping to continue in the remarks section without making that clear.

I believe a person can suffer from homophobia without having any overt sense of hatred  in their heart. I was being generous by saying I didn’t think the author harbored any homophobia in their heart but that didn’t seem to matter. The intensity of the comments that ensued and some of the hate mail I have received since then makes my point for me.

The Buddha said he was concerned about two things: human suffering and how to put an end to it. Our job is to help reduce the amount of suffering in the world. Sometimes being skillful can result in controversy, resistance, and misunderstanding. Public perceptions don’t change until members of a minority group raise the bar high enough for themselves so that they realize they have the same value as the majority. 

When I witness anyone saying things or enforcing policies that directly or indirectly cause suffering for any other group of people, I will continue to speak out and it is my hope that you join me in this one day.

Kindly,

Dō’an

Comments

[Paul Lynch]

It is difficult for many to accept the pain and suffering of others, I believe this makes many of us uncomfortable. It is interesting how easy it is for us today to attack each other about our beliefs. Instead of compassion, many of us just follow our ideology and never stop long enough to ask the question, did I perhaps unintentionally cause others suffering or confusion.

It is least important what we think we mean when we speak, it is most important to be open to the possibility that others may not fully understand our words. If we move into this life with the attitude of understanding correct situation, correct function and correct relationship, then our opinions are not important and it becomes easy to acknowledge our mistakes.

When we attach deeply to our opinions, we lose the sense of open communication that comes with our advanced ability to use language. It seems that today it does not matter the impression that others have of our speech, it is just important to say what you want and to rail over those who perhaps innocently misunderstand. Somehow, we have lost touch with others in this relationship, and because our own sense of "I" is most important, damn anyone else who disagrees.

I want to thank Ven. Do'an for keeping the dialog open because he is serving as a model for all of us to follow into our daily lives. There is already enough negative energy in the world, and none of us are perfect. Let us all accept our frailty and lack of partial clarity to enter into a phase of more accurate communications. Moreover, let us not attach to our words and manifest compassion always in every moment of our lives.

Ven. Yuanzhi

[Steve Leong]

Perhaps God created Gays to curb the world's over population, or find loving parents for children abandoned by straights. There are a thousand ways to look at every event. I choose the most positive one. Why not.

Steven Leong

[Angle Bird]

Can you said the killer already kill,
please take precept and prevent killing?
Even dead sentence does not make the doer, undo.
With great wisdom of Buddha,
even the killer were surrender to Buddha.
Buddha ask why you running and never stop.
So don't find the arrow of the one that shoot at me,
instead find were is the poison come from.

[Nancy Thompson]

I think it's important to speak up and question subtle assumptions when we see them. The person may be unaware they are making assumptions, and as Buddhists we seek to strip off those culturally or socially or whatever-imposed beliefs to get to the truth.

It's unfortunate that some people respond with hatred. That says more about the quality of their thoughts than the validity of your words.

Thank you for speaking up, and please continue to do so.

[natural medicine center]

Quality post !! Well done with the post !!